My Dear Husband has a phrase in Spanish that says: "Las amistades pierden vigencia©", I'm not sure if the translation to English really is the best (Friendships loose validity), but it's all I can think of. He also claims to have the copyrights to it. :)
Some of our friends were a little offended by the terms. But is it really THAT bad? Isn't it true? Sometimes life takes us in different directions. Things get a bit more complicated. Maybe work, distance, family, play a part in this. In these past 3 months, which we have been working hard in the planning of our yearly camp, I've found this to be true.
The girl who was my best friend, Milky Way, well, we're not really close anymore. I feel like a hypocrite if I use the term "Best Friend" with her. We have a polite relationship. I don't doubt that part of it was my fault. But after all, relationships are a two way street. It takes 2 people, at least. On the other hand, a friendship that once was strong and "lost validity", is now closer than ever. So things shifted a bit. Friend #2, "D'Teacher", has been a great inspiration, providing lots of help in this planning process, and we are simply enjoying the new stage in our lives, and in our friendship.
I also strengthen another friendship, Special-K. This one came sort of a surprise. I am not sure we were ever ThisClose, unlike with D'Teacher at some point. And it had been a great experience. We find that having the same zodiac sign really means having a lot of similar qualities. We think alike, love alike, hurt alike and we can speak English together, unlike our other friends.
It really has been amazing. Lots of planning, fun, sharing of private feelings, tears, and that comforting feeling that you have someone you can confide with. Some between the 3 of us, some between Special-K and I, some between D'Teacher and I.
So I guess I "won"... I sort of "lost" a friend but gained 2. Even though that sounds a bit harsh, I believe we will be close again. Not necessarily as we were before, but that doesn't mean it would be less special. Just a different friendship, appreciating where and what we are at that given time.
Cheers to my girls, who make my days better! Even though I don't say it frequently: I Love You!
2 comments:
Friendship is a process, not a given state or title. It is certain that the relationships change... the way you enjoy the company of a friend may vary, and simply, who may be your buddy just now, may not be your buddy tomorrow. But it is also true-- having lots of true friends-- that they are still part of the list of people you can call in case of emergency.
Think about it as Ice Cream. This summer could be a "Rocky Road" mania... and then next year you crave for "Mocha". You still like Rocky Road.. but not in the mood for it this time.
You know, I agree with this. Friends come and go, and we have to understand it to be a part of life.
Sometimes, when I think about leaving PR in two years, it makes me think of the friends I know I will lose. It's not like I want to lose contact with them... but I think it will be eventually unavoidable. OF course, there are other friends that I know will stay for years to come... but still, it makes me think about all of this.
One thing I am doing is dedicating time to cultivate those friends that I know can withstand the years and distance. And, also accepting that sometimes, not talking to someone for a while can lead to a great time with a bottle of wine catching up on all our personal gossip! :-D hahaha...
Post a Comment